Most people know that I was abused as a child. I've never kept it a secret. It's not my sin. I didn't choose it so why should I be embarrassed about it? And I truly believe that because these things aren't spoken about, it helps to let the abuse and stigma around abuse to continue and keeps the healing from coming for the victims. Yes, I was severely sexually abused for many years by a family member and have suffered from depression, anxiety and PTSD for decades. But I survived. In the only way I could.
I came across this article a few days ago and wanted to post about it but had some other things going on. But you guys, this article is spot on. It is a long, in depth read but if you have a friend or family member and statistically you do, probably more than 1 actually, that has been abused. Or if you are a survivor yourself. It is so worth the read. You will understand so much more about us and how we've survived. My husband has struggled by my side for 15 years trying to navigate the minefield that is PTSD. He has seen more of the ugly side of me than anyone else has ever seen. And it's been hard on our marriage at times. But he's stuck by me through every nightmare, angry lash outs, and crying spells over the most trivial of things. And that is my biggest regret. That he has to hurt for what was done to me. He hurts for me because I hurt. Although I know he wouldn't trade it for the world, it's not fair to him.
But anyways, here is a very small excerpt from the article. Kind of shows the many sides of survivors personalities. We may act fine and extroverted but in reality it's a facade that we put in place to keep others from digging too deep into our psyche and seeing the ugliness.
"Survivors with PTSD may avoid any intimate connection, often resulting in feelings of detachment or estrangement from others....Survivors often have highly developed social skills and may seem to be extremely extroverted, but their dealings with others may preclude vulnerability"
Please take 10 minutes if you can and read it. And maybe the next time one of your friends or family members acts out in a certain way, you just might understand a little better. Or the next time your friend has to take an anxiety pill over something trivial (to you) you might understand why the trivial things are so much harder for us. When something sad happens, you might understand a little better why we can't function for days when most are over it within a few hours.
Just read it, for me. Please.http://www.naasca.org/2011-Articles/081411-PTSDinAdultSurvivors.htm
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